On Heneral Luna

Mali ata na pinanood ko ang “Heneral Luna” ng last full show, hindi ako nakatulog masyado kase nabother ako. Di ako mapakali. Supposedly, Facebook post lang to, pero dumami gusto kong sabihin. Sandali, mai-enumerate nga:

1. Kudos sa cast kase binuhay nyo ang mga karakter pati na din ang emosyon ng tao. Sa una medyo magugulat ka sa casting na parang malabo, tapos mapapa-“in fairness” ka sa pagganap ng bawat isa. Congratulations kay Mon Confiado kase di na rapist ang ginampanan nya kundi isang passive-aggressive na pangulo ng Pilipinas. Kay Ketchup Eusebio din, kase finally, kahit minor character lang sya e, napatay naman nya ang bida. Si John Arcilla, na swakto ang role sa kanya, ang intense nya, para mo syang pinapanood sa teatro. Si Epy Quizon, effective din bilang si Apolinario Mabini. First time ko ata sya napanood sa role na napaka-kalmado. Kay Nonie Buencamino din, kase nakakapikon sya.

2. Bet ko yung gumanap na Rizal e hindi si Piolo Pascual or sinong sikat na artista (or di ko lang kilala talaga yung artista). Ang mga Pilipino kase mahilig sumamba at umidolo. Yung paggamit nila ng “who you?” or anonymity factor e suggestive ng demystification ni Rizal. Hello, hindi sya lage ang bida.

3. Gusto ko yung tableau ng Spoliarium. Medyo awkward pano nagtransition sa eksena na yun, sobrang “K, I see what you did there” pero na-appreciate ko yung effort. Or baka Art Stud kase ako kaya gusto ko yung may mga allusion sa paintings.

4. Ang mga kababaihan rin naman ay nagkaroon ng mahalagang papel sa pelikula. Andyan ang mga babaeng sumabak sa digmaan, ang pagiging socially aware ng karakter ni Mylene Dizon at ng mga kababaihan ng Cruz Roa, at syempre ang ulirang ina na ginampanan ni Bing Pimentel. Bagamat maikli lamang ang eksena ng ina ni Luna dito, at karamihan pa ay flashback na nagpakita kung gano ka-privileged ang pamilya Luna, e malakas pa din ang empathy dahil sa point of view ng ina. Interesting din na sobrang naging contrast ito sa portrayal sa nanay ni Aguinaldo na napaka cold blooded, nakakashock ng slight. That b*tch. Charot!

5. Mabuti din na naipalabas muna dito yung pelikula bago naibandila sa bansang banyaga. For sure, ma-appreciate nila yung film in a formalistic sense, ngunit hindi kasing lalim ng hugot at reflection ng mga Pilipino. Kadalasan kasi ng mga ganitong uri ng pelikula e nauunang ipalabas sa mga tanghalan sa ibang bansa bago dito, minsan piling piling sinehan pa naipapalabas.

6. Nung isang gabi natanong ako baket ang mga Pilipino hindi kasing Nationalistic let’s say ng mga Hapon. Malaking factor ang pagiging arkipelago ng Pilipinas. Bawat rehiyon, may iba’t ibang kultura. Ang sobrang pagtangkilik sa sariling rehiyonal na kultura madalas ay nagreresulta sa pagkakaroon ng feeling ng superiority (ethnocentrism kumbaga) patungo sa ibang rehiyonal na kultura. Dito din lumalabas ang stereotypes sa mga rehiyon – katulad ng nosyon na mayayabang ang mga Pampannggenyo, pala-away ang mg Batanggenyo, at maiingay ang mga Bisaya. Ako lang ba ang nafrustrate nung narinig ko yung “Sa kapwa Kabitenyo lang ako susunod” (or something)? Hindi lang naman mga Kabitenyo ang Pilipino, ano! Sana ang mga pelikulang gaya nito ay tumulong na mag dugsong-dugsong sa mga pagkakaiba sa bawat kultura’t rehiyon, para naman yung sense ng “Nationalism” naten ay hindi selective sa sariling rehiyonal na kultura lamang.

7. Good to know din na ang pelikulang ito ay “fiction based on facts”. Pinortray dito ang kasaysayan ngunit may mga parte na romanticized at ginawang cinematic. Mabuti ding itanong kung bakit ganito ang treatment sa mga eksena o sa pangkalahatan ng pelikula. Kaninong kasaysayan ito? Kanino naka-address ang pelikula? Saan mayaman at kapos ang pelikula? At anong implikasyon nito sa mga manonood? Naisip mo ba gano ka-timely ang pelikulang ito? Nagalit ka ba kay Aguinaldo? Naisip mo ba paano ka din minsan o madalas naging si Aguinaldo?

8. Since malapit na maging thesis ito, lighter notes naman. Yung “punyeta” at “p*tang ina” walang kasing intense, pwede sumali sa cast si Angelica Panganiban. Pwede din ako pag high blood ako.

9. Sobrang nabother din ako kay Heneral Del Pilar. Baket ang kinis kinis nya sa panahon ng digmaan??? Na-excite ako tuloy sa 2nd installation.



Wallpaper Wonders

I am usually the type of person to enjoy pretty sights. And in such lonely and plain work area, I kind of rave for something interesting and inspiring just to get me through another day.

Aside from having a few postcards on my wall (which I stripped off some days ago because I’ll be transferring office) and colorful flaglets and post its, I give love to my computer/laptop by giving it a new look every now and then. I think I changed wallpaper some three weeks ago.

Here is how it looks now:

Screen shot 2014-07-25 at 6.34.52 PM

It took me a while before settling for this one. Images from DESIGN LOVE FEST will actually give you a hard time deciding! I think it took me four changes before I eventually convinced myself that this is the best pick.

Design Love Fest is a a lifestyle blog featuring design, style, DIY, food, travel, entertaining, etc. Bri Emery, the Art Director behind the blog, transformed the site from a studio to an art house. She and her blog have been featured in Elle Décor, Apartment Therapy, HGTV, Lucky Magazine, Martha Stewart Weddings, The Los Angeles Times and more.

Take a look from the wallpapers I have hoarded from her! I think I have used two or three of my past wallpapers from these.

I like how her designs shift from watercolors, oil, graphic, and typography. The pastel tones are pretty cute bonus points.

You may get these cute wallpaper downloads under her Design Your Tech posts, or by simply clicking at her Downloads categories.


In other news, (well, I kind of mentioned it above) I am transferring work area next week. It does not excite me at all since I detest the work schedule and I will be having a smaller cubicle (so I’ve heard). But I hope pretty images like this will last me until the remaining two months (more or less) of employment in this company.




The Week I Cried the Most

I used to think days have their own way of turning things upside down and inside out. Interestingly, I never seen a week, a month, or a year that way.

June is one of my favorite months. Birthdays are celebrated here and there, including the boyfriend’s. It’s when you celebrate Independence Day and get free train rides during rush hour. It’s when I allot all my hoarded vacation leaves at work so I could get myself to the beach. Summer’s last hurrah, yes. This time however, the week I thought would be of sheer bliss, turned out otherwise.

Pardon me, I will have to overshare.

  • My boyfriend and I caught The Fault in our Stars in cinemas. I rarely read nowadays since books are forbidden in our workplace but The Fault in our Stars didn’t prevent me in reading and bawling in my cubicle. The movie was how I expected it to be, nothing better compared to the book as some details were left out. I do however shed tears at the scene where Hazel and Isaac were to read their eulogies to Gus. I’m a sucker for beautiful words and I can only imagine how much beautiful yet painful it could be to offer them to one’s existence and absence. Well, at least I no longer gasped for breath in the theater like the girl who sat a seat apart from me.
  • Mocha passed away. We spent several days in Palawan for the boyfriend’s birthday. Before we left, I spoke to our bunnies to behave and not cause headache to my parents. (Though I asked them to make cuter and paawa faces to my sister and parents whenever they want to play outside). We were on the way home from our Underground River trip when we received news that our little baby Mocha passed away that morning. My parents said she had weird bowel movements the day before and was acting drowsy. They thought it was kind of normal since Mocha has the tendency to be passive aggressive at times (you know, lady bunnies). My boyfriend and I cried on the way back to the hotel. Instead of trying out the night life in Puerto Princesa, we spent the night quietly.
Marvelous Mocha, already in full fluff at around 5 months old

Marvelous Mocha, already in full fluff at around 5 months old

  • My iPod drowned. Yes, I cried over that because I get sentimental over photos and videos and memories and lists. Only then have I realized I have a percentage of my life stored in that little dummy thing. Plus, I have Mocha’s and all the other bunnies’ photos there too.
  • My boyfriend and I got into a vehicular accident. I guess I wouldn’t have cried so much for the sake of the accident alone. Well, not until I got a glimpse of my burned leg. We were rushed to the nearest hospital for first aid.  I kept tugging my boyfriend’s arm the entire time they were giving me first aid. I kept asking the nurse what is this and what is that they were applying. I can feel my legs sore then numb then sore again. I never really liked hospitals, mind you, so that was an extra bad memory again. I was on seven days sick leave as the doctors advised that I take rest. On those days, my boyfriend was the one in charge of cleaning the burned area. I cried every time. I bit on shirts and chomped on pillows just to let go of the sting and the pain. I was still a brave girl according to him. I would insist on doing normal things like walking around, playing with pets, and pulling my legs straight when sleeping. I guess I am pretty brave for someone who has low tolerance for pain. I’m no longer posting my leg’s photo because that would be crazy gross oversharing, but it’s already healing.


I can still hardly believe that all happened within a week. Well, referring to bullets 2 and 4, the first and third one was just for some extra tear count. Small regrets though, wish I had been there when Mocha was having troubles. I usually have panic attacks so when I see her in a condition that bad, I would have called whoever or have already taken her to the vet.

Also, I would have wanted to turn back time and play the fourth bullet incident in slow motion. However, I am charging this to experience. I will smile and sigh at my battle scars: “Gawd, I’m brave”.

Recent Reading

It’s been seven months since I started Roland Barthes’ A Lover’s Discourse and I am not done with it yet. I’d like to think it’s because I juggle it with J. D. Salinger’s Catcher in the Rye and Tracy Chevalier’s Girl with the Pearl Earring, but truth is, I have not dedicated hours and days to reading anymore.

It’s a shame I haven’t given as much time to novels. These days I’d rather spend the entire day at the office getting exhausted of Social Media matters which Forbes recently deemed, not an actual career. Sucks, I know. And on weekends, I do errands like grocery shopping, walking my pet to the park, girlfriend duties, etc.

I miss the luxury of laying down in bed, leafing through the pages, meeting characters, and getting immense sympathy for them to the point of investing emotions and bawling in tears at their expense. I can only recall how much I loved Salinger’s detailed conversations in Franny and Zooey that I actually played the scene on my mind the moment I was reading it. I can only remember the feelings the unnamed characters endured in David Levithan’s  A Lover’s Dictionary in order for them to keep the relationship. I can only recollect becoming victorious and infinite with Charlie in Stephen Chbosky’s Perks of Being a Wallflower. With Salinger’s Catcher in the Rye, I find joy in picturing Holden Caufield and his relationships and conversations with schoolmates which reminds me of my years studying far from home and not being somewhat aloof to the new people. Yes, I have not yet moved from that part of the book.

As for philosophical reads, I take more time to digest them as compared to fiction. I try to relate and ponder at every chapter and identify myself with the text. Yes, I recall instances of my life and compare and relate to what I have read. Think: Antoine de Saint Exupery’s The Little Prince, Blaise Pascal’s On Human Happiness, and letters and writings of Kahlil Gibran. These are the kind of books that are not just as easy to read. I mean, I always feel like reading into them means more than reading into them, like there is a whole lot of message you need to understand.

And right now, I take the same particularity in reading Barthes. You see, the problem with reading his text is that, knowing he is a semiologist, I tend to read, let’s say a paragraph, all over again thinking he embedded somewhere between words some sort of sign. It is kind of confusing how familiarity brings about complexity in reading. Or, am I just being too critical? Ugh.

Oh well. Bottomline, I need a time off and save a date for a date with these books lined up on my bedside table.

Writing and Funneling

Hello blog!

It’s been a while. I see that your interface has changed. Not that I do not notice every time I log in to see updates on other blogs, it’s just that I haven’t posted a new blog post since. The last one was a blog submitted via smart phone because I thought my phone can’t be smart enough without a wordpress software/blog function.

Well anyway, I haven’t been writing for lame and justifiable reasons. One is that I have been out some weekends, as seen in these photos:

Boyfriend's Boracay Birthday

Boyfriend’s Boracay Birthday

Camping at Burot Beach with the office Breakfast Club

Camping at Burot Beach with the office Breakfast Club

After these (this is number two), I suffered from viral infection for more or less a week. Good thing it didn’t turn into dengue or some other disease. I just took a rest and stayed indoors. My allergies also zoomed up and I have red patches all over my arms and chest and face. Too much sun and stress I guess.

Speaking of stress (third on my list), I have been pretty much pre-occupied with work lately. My mailing initiatives have gradually declined, yet I am already preparing for my holiday letters. I am kind of excited for this since I have always been excited for Christmas. I received bad news some two weeks ago, I lost my copywriter and I am to make my own captions for all the company’s social media platforms. That means more marketing writing and I don’t like it. Remember when I wrote press releases for the gallery? Yes, almost the same. This one’s worse though, I am to embed hardsell in one to two sentences which is like really going to scream hardsell.

The boyfriend noticed I haven’t been writing him as much letters as before. I blame reasons one, two, and three, plus my emotional instability aka hormones, mood swings, impatience, and temper. With that four, I haven’t afforded to write him romantic verses, not even dedicate random lines of a poem. I chose to sulk and suck. That was a safe decision though, rather than write about mess.

And so, that was my art of filtering/funneling. I promise to make good entries soon. Also, forgive the language of this blog post, it is so blog-gy.

Let your words be anything but empty*

Brave is Sara Bareilles’ new single for her upcoming album.

The title seems to be a give away on what the song is all about. Midst its inspirational and motivational tone, I am more interested in how it suggests the power of words. A word is but a small element that makes up a statement or a story. One word suggests an array of meanings and one placed after another could mean so much more. It can convey feelings and emotions and beliefs. It can be a weapon, a shield, an armor, an amulet.

Words can hurt, liberate, and inspire.

Listen to the song. What words went right through you?

*Lyrics from the song

On Summer’s End

I took the last bus ride home from the beach. I usually liked taking the night trip as I find it more relaxed and comfortable. I used to like passing through dim-lighted streets, making the stars even brighter. I used to like looking through the window where the featured sceneries that were once brimming with life has gone to sleep, dark and peaceful. I used to like the feeling of being above the earth, as if I was cradled in a hammock, with lullaby inducing sleep. However tonight, everything feels far different.

I feel uneasy. There’s something that keeps me awake, aback. My hair still smelt of seawater, making it dry and sticky at the same time. My skin was still warm and moist and dewy. My fingers moved not to the rhythm of the songs in my ipod, but paddled to the waves instead. My feet are a little dry and scaly with the tiniest of sand and dust in between my toes.

I no longer see the stars midst the dim streetlights, nor the streets gone dark and peaceful. All the windows exhibited was the playful sun, the balmy weather, the cheerful waves, and me running to the shore to greet the water. All i know is that, all that has been flashing through me is but the most recent and the swiftest memory. And the more the bus treads on its path, the farther I get from it, inch by little inch.

I wonder what is happening? I wonder how it has gone this way this time.

But all seasons are supposed to be short and temporary, does this mean this will be the end and/of the last?

1/12, And It’s Not Yet Too Late

I have been away for quite a time. I haven’t even posted this year’s goals, and here goes:

1. Save

I mean, I say this every year. But maybe I should learn not to spend more than I earn or not to spend more than I save. I will have to negotiate with myself on that.

2. Read more books.

12 books in a year is a pretty feasible target for many. But not for my pretty weird activities and schedule, it’s shamefully hard to reach! So there, I also promise to finish Roland Barthes within the month. Just some theoretical shiz to balance out all the romantic stuff.

3. Listen to good music

8tracks is a gift to mankind! It’s a repository of mixtapes from whoever around the world. I got new contents for my ipod from here. And it’s free!

4. Tour and explore Metro Manila

Because I fancy going places and finding out interesting things from wherever, the culture vulture me wants to explore further places in the metro or places nearby. It’s better to associate Manila with culture rather than traffic and smog.

5. Write more

Just this morning, I came up with a writing idea springing from a friend’s old letter to me. I’m so excited for this, but I guess it will be long project. Release dates will be next year, methinks.

Also, I just wrote 3 fictions last year. 2 of which were published here. I think I need to write more.

6. Learn to cook

I am so much into baking I forgot personal training in the old dirty kitchen. Yes, I will save time for this, uhm, along with baking. Yes.

7. Take care of my phone

Basically because it’s the boyfriend’s Christmas present to me and he saves me the time of updating OS, downloading applications, etc. So in return, I have to take outmost care for this little pretty thing.

8. Be more concerned with skin

I’ll throw creams and lotions to my skin. I’ll moisturize. I’ll learn how to put on make up correctly. Duh.

9. Remain connected with art

There are loves you cannot lose. Never. So here I am, with a red thread spun to my fingers, and with art’s – promising to read, write and feel more about it.

This is my Blog’s Personality, Judge Me

I brushed through my tumblr and found this link analyzing your blog’s personality.  I tried it before and my tumblr was diagnosed as a blog of a happy female in between 13-17 years old. So, after more or less two years, I had my WordPress up for the test:

Bloggers do grow old

So, I jumped from being a 13-17 year old blogger to a 66-100 year old in two blogging years. That’s kind of funny. Well, truth is, I funnel my posts in WordPress – that it may be light yet personal (journal-ish) with less rants and random stuff.

So I guess my WordPress is brimming with wisdom and happiness of old age. I can already see my future, I ‘d be a cool grandma who’s contented with afternoons knitting and gardening when not in front of the computer.